Unapologetic. Queer. Mami.

Image: Rosa and her Mami sit at a table crocheting.

Unapologetic. Queer. Mami.

Rosa and her Mami enjoying their favorite pastime.
I am a proud, unapologetic, queer, Mexican Mami raising two little Black people. Most folks don’t consider my motherhood traditional, but what is traditional mamahood anyway? Even though I didn’t birth my twins, I am still “Mami” in their eyes and they find safety in my embrace. My encounters with folks outside of my family are always interesting. People assume that I gave birth to my kids because I am a femme-identified person, which really invisibilizes my partner who is masculine-presenting.

There would be no movement without mamas.

For the past almost-four years, Mami-hood has completely taken over my life, but in the most beautiful ways possible. It means I am doing laundry, taking calls, cleaning my home, and doing as many things as possible all at the same time. The beauty of it all is that as a Mami — and for the first time in my life — I have a very clear and focused vision of my life’s path. Everything I do is grounded in my love for my family. I must admit, I love this year’s Mamas Day theme of Power and Flowers. Mamas need flowers. We also need coffee. We need manis and pedis, and we need massages. This theme also reminds me how powerful we mamas really are. Seriously, what I can accomplish before 10 AM is miraculous. I clean my house, make sure everybody’s fed, get my kids ready for school, and then prepare for my movement work. Before having kids, getting myself fed and out the door, on time, was a huge accomplishment!

Actually, there would be no movement without Mamas. We hold the movement. We have fought tirelessly to ensure our families have the rights, resources and recognition they need to survive and thrive. We are full of resilience and strength. I just wish that the majority of the world understood the power of mamas.

Although our movements have always been held by mamas, I don’t think our movements have always taken care of mamas. Things are constantly being asked of us. We are usually pulled in different directions, and we tend to be really exhausted. So I would like to see a movement where we’re actually taking care of our Mamas too, because we also need sabbaticals, sick days and mental health days. I often wonder what it would look like if our movement took care of our mamas instead of mamas always taking care of the movement.